Sink or Stay Afloat?

Occasionally I realize I don't have enough time, physical energy, emotional energy to keep up with everything that a mother is supposed to do.

And then the tears floweth.

For example, yesterday after coming inside from playing with the tots, I burst into tears at the reality that surrounded me in the kitchen.

The floor was strewn with who knows what... homemade birthday hats, church bag stuff (courtesy tornado Max the bag-diver), socks, shoes, white t-shirts clobbered with red popsicle, goobs, etc.

The kitchen island was covered with either dishes, sunscreen, fruit snacks, dead mother's day plant, tylenol, air freshner, camera, water bottles, vegetable seed packets, swingset sign, etc, etc.

I realize that we spent most of the day/week busy with either school stuff or playing with the kids, but I also realized that this was going to be my summer... and I had to NOT freak out if my house wasn't as tidy as I'd like (not that it's as tidy as i'd like EVER). But it's soooo hard for me!

Every time I walk into a room, it screams 'tidy me'... from laundry to toys, to laundry, to balls, to laundry... you get the picture.

But I basically don't have the energy to do it all. Max has been so clingy lately and pulls off my not-quite-fitting maternity pants so I'll hold him. During quiet time and after bedtime, I'm completely zapped of any spark of energy. And my feet can't handle constantly walking around... they are already swelling from pregnancy and heat.

Whine... whine... whine...

But I know crying about it won't solve the problem (though a good cry sure releases oodles of pent-up female emotions).

Forge onward I must with faith that the Lord will give me strength to do the most important things as a mother.

I think this quote needs to be my life theme.

"Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction." Elder M. Russell Ballard (April 2008 Conference)

I recognize the 3 lovelies that I'm caring for and they do bring me joy.

Today a fairy Hannah was swinging with her eyes closed so that she could FLY as high as the sky. Her carefree spirit made me smile.

An Abraham gave me a big squishy hug and said 'i love you'. He came in elated that he went on a bike ride with dad. His enthusiasm for life brings me joy.

A Max pitter-patted and ran to find shoes to play outside.  He waves his arm so big to tell me he wants to go outside and swing.  And he laid his head on my shoulder. His lovie softened my heart.

I guess I'll survive and stay afloat - after all what else is there to do?!

Just keep swimming ... just keep swimming ... just keep swimming!