Catching the Spark ... once again

Sooo... I had a crummy weekend filled with oodles and puddles and oceans of tears. My poor family had to endure a mother who didn't want to talk or work or anything. I was too empty to keep giving. I knew I wasn't doing all the things necessary to fill up my bucket but it was hard. You know those days - when you think you might have to quit your job because you can't do anything right? ummmm yeah.

Well... hopefully all my wallowing and tears and self-pity are behind me for a while.

I was reading my blog posts from last June to see what the kids looked like (Max was so small!!), to see what we were doing, and how I felt about stuff...

and I came across this post where I shared some of my favorite Sheri Dew quotes from a talk she gave in 1998.

Most of the quotes are about light, looking to Christ, catching the Spark of the Spirit... just what I needed to awake my spirit into doing what is right by trying to focus on goodness instead of life's unfairness (or what I consider unfair anways).

I won't reshare all the quotes (though they are worth reading) but here is one that particularly caught my eye:

"Do you believe that the Savior will really do for you what he has said he will do? That he can ease the sting of loneliness and enable you to deal with that haunting sense of inadequacy? That he will help you forgive? That he can fill you with optimism and hope? That he will help you resist your greatest temptation and tame your most annoying weakness? That he will respond to your deepest longing? That he is the only source of comfort, strength, direction, and peace that will not change, will not betray you, and will never let you down?" Sheri Dew 1998

Sometimes I know my heart needs to be softened and my mind quieted. I keep having to learn these lessons. My spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak (or something like that).

I think of this Primary song that reminds me that I have all I need (the Gospel and the Savior) all within my grasp and I just need to have that simple faith to keep a goin':

1. The Lord has blessed me with gospel truth.
I have learned His ways in my early youth.
I will share my light for I know it's right
To testify of Him.
The Lord has blessed me with simple faith.
If I pray for help, He will give me strength.
I will do His work. I will gladly serve.
I'll follow Him in faith.

2. The Lord has blessed me to feel His love.
I have felt His promptings and learned to trust.
So in all I do, I'll be faithful to
The things I know are true.
The Lord has blessed me in many ways.
With a thankful heart I will sing His praise.
I will raise my voice and proclaim my choice
To follow Him in faith.
He has shown the way, and through all my days,
I'll follow Him in faith.

Janice Kapp Perry, "I'll Follow Him in Faith," Friend, Jan. 2003, 24